Unka Glen

Anonymous asked: Hi Unka Glen! Lately, I’ve been feeling really… fat. I grew up thinking insecurities (about looks) were REALLY BAD. so when I was younger, I used to condemn girls who went on diets, who exercised, who wore makeup, who wanted to be pretty… But now I’m realizing that I too have those insecurities, and I too have the desire to be thin and healthy and beautiful. I know God loves me the way I am, but I also… want to be pretty. and I guess I just don’t know how to reconcile that.

Unka Glen answered: Well, I could tell you that God loves you the way you are, but you already know that, I could tell you that external beauty lasts for a very brief period of time, and that bitchy can last forever, I could even tell you that like most healthy American males, I thought the “before” pictures of Jennifer Lawrence looked better than the airbrushed “after” pictures.

But the truth is, there’s only one opinion that counts in this situation, and that’s your opinion. If you think you’re fat, then, well, you are fat. If you think thin is beautiful, then you’re going to either be miserable about your weight, or be anorexic. There really isn’t another way out of that. Until you change your mind about your looks, you’re kind of stuck.

The good news is, you can just decide that you’re beautiful inside and out, jiggles and all, and then, well… you are. In fact when you think of it that way, it seems pretty strange to let anyone else influence that decision, at all. No person should have that kind of power over you. 

Now if YOU decide that you’re beautiful, and beyond that you want to feel pretty, maybe wear a cute dress or put on some girly makeup, then by all means sista, get your glamour on. And if you want to maybe get in some exercise, get the endorphins flowing, feel a little lighter, get a little more energized, all the better.

But trying to change your feelings about yourself by what you wear, or what you weigh, is doomed to fail if you’ve already decided you’re not beautiful.

Imagine a poor person, perhaps a single mother living in a rough part of town. What would you tell her about beauty? What would you tell her about nutrition, exercise, and fashion? How would you help her? Apply those lessons to yourself, and you never know, maybe God can use you to help others. There’s nothing more beautiful than a woman of God who lifts others up.