elleinwonderland asked: I’ve encountered churches who feel that it’s not a woman’s place to lead anything other than possibly children’s ministry (because that’s safe and cute, right?) and Christian men who state ‘submissiveness’ as a quality they want in a woman. From what I’ve heard, the submission is meant to go both ways right? Husbands and wives are *both* supposed to serve and love and make sacrifices for each other. Here’s the thing - that word really riles me. I’m a career woman. I dream of running my own business. I’m the girl who will stand up and say what she thinks and asks for what she wants. I used to work for the church, I am *big* into mission among disengaged teenagers, and I have taught theology (and yes, shock horror, I have taught theology to guys). What’s the deal here? Does God really want me to sit down and shut up? And how should I respond to the people who tell me He does?
Unka Glen answered: Well, let’s start here, if men really cared about the influence of women preaching or teaching (as opposed to stealing their limelight), they would START with children’s ministry and missions. If you want to be an influence on the future of Christianity, that’s where you want to be today. Of course, the way the mainstream church is structured today, there is little money and no recognition in doing either of those jobs well, so both can certainly feel like an afterthought within the church.
I’m going to post a couple of links below that cover this subject both from a Biblical and a practical viewpoint, but you’re absolutely right. We’re all called to be servants, and we’re all called to serve one another. And you’re also right that spiritual leadership and “shot calling” are two massively different things (as I explore in one of those links).
When it comes to submission, you’re meant to submit to God. If God tells you to follow your husband’s lead, then you’re still submitting to God. And your husband is accountable to God to lead in exactly the way God would want that done.
Maybe it’s because I was born and raised in Texas, the international and intergalactic capital of strong women, but I like both your attitude towards life and your career, and for sure I like your attitude towards serving the Lord. You sound, to me, like a Proverbs 31 woman all the way.
There’s nothing wrong with the woman being the glitter and the man being the glue.
Some insecure men like the spotlight, and like the attention, and they like feeling like “big daddy”. Instead, find a man you can trust to only assert himself when it’s serving your need for rest, peace, or perspective. Only a weak and insecure man is intimidated by a strong woman.