Unka Glen

Unka Glen

Anonymous asked: Hi Uncle Glen, I don’t really know how else to put this, but I’ve been looking for a job for the past 2 years now, and it’s very frustrating. And I hate that at times I would pray and ask God “Am I not good enough for these kind of jobs?” or “Am I asking for too much?” , “Do I not deserve this job?” I feel really crappy that I would end up asking God those questions when I know better than to think like that. I’m so confused, I don’t know what to do…any advice? Thanks in advance Unka Glen! [edited for length]

Unka Glen answered: There’s actually two problems here. The first is looking down on yourself. Why wouldn’t you ask: “is this job not good enough for me?”, am I settling for too little?”. or “do you want something better for me. Lord?” I’m wondering if this might be His way of getting your attention and showing you just that.

The other problem is, you’re looking down on God. WAY down. Let’s put it this way, imagine your friend says to you, “I’m having problems finding a job”, would you ever say, in a million years, “get the hint, you just aren’t good enough, so you’re asking for way better than what you deserve”? Of course you wouldn’t, but how do we imagine God, with infinite patience, mercy, and love, would be colder and meaner than… us?

That’s the problem with putting ourselves down, we end up putting down others for loving and believing in us, instead of agreeing with us. Insecurities seem to be self-inflicted, but we end up assuming the worst in everyone around us, and that’s just not cool. There’s no such thing as a sin that only effects you.

And speaking of putting yourself down, what, may I ask, is so wrong with you? Huh? Why is it the default answer that you suck, as opposed to, ya know, the job market sucking? Trust me beloved: you rock, it’s the world that sucks. Jesus said that “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33). 

But even with all that said, these questions, miles off as they may be, are still good questions to ask. I ask God about a dozen really dumb questions a day. “Is it just me or are these people crazy?”, or “Why can’t you just make them behave?”, or “When will kilts make a comeback?” You name it. But the key thing is to listen to the answer. 

Some of the most important things I’ve learned have come as answers to pretty silly questions. So be still, tune out all the distractions, express all these crazy feelings, and lay them down on the altar. In that moment, you’ll hear that still, small voice that God speaks into our hearts, but don’t be surprised when His thoughts turn out to be radically different than yours, especially on the subject of you sucking. 

“Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” (Isaiah 30:21) 

mercyshipdude asked: Hey Unka Glen, Congrats on launching the Bridge! I’m really looking forward to gleaning lots of good wisdom and advice from you guys. Lately, I find myself entrenched in a Tumblr sub-culture of depression/cutting/thin-living/Eating Disorder blogs. I admit that I wasn’t really prepared for this. I don’t have a lot of experience with depression, but my heart bleeds for these people. They are trapped by their own depression, and by the lies that they tell themselves. Besides prayer, what can I do? I would like to help, to reach out, but most of them have the support of hundreds of other ED/cutting/depression people, all saying there’s nothing to be done. How do I break that barrier, and offer a glimpse of God’s hope? I’m kind of lost in this area, and would appreciate any help you can offer. What should I do? What can I do? Thanks again! [edited for length]

Unka Glen answered: If you want to reverse the effect of this kind of all-consuming negative mindset, it’s important to see how in most cases it was a single lie, one that took root and spread like a virus through the person’s entire life, effecting how they see themselves, the world, and God Himself.

The enemy can whisper in your ear: “you’re not good enough”, and suddenly you’re thinking, well, I do keep on sinning in certain ways that I hate, so maybe I’m not good enough, and of course the whole world knows it, and obviously God rejects me because of it, so I’m doomed. You can keep looking at yourself and see endless imperfections and your mind can keep going, like a rat on one of those little wheels, for years before the truth occurs to you.

The truth, in this case, being: of course I’m not good enough, I’m not good at all. God is good, and He sent His son to die for me, and His Son was dang sure good enough, and so I’m saved because He was good enough in my place, and if I’m good at all today, it’s because God is good THROUGH me. 

So the idea is, you want to plant your own virus, a “truth virus”, that will take hold as deep, and will spread just as far. You want to say something, seasoned with grace, that they can’t un-hear, and that they can’t write off. The Bible calls it planting a seed, but I like truth virus, (sounds like a good name for an action movie… if you’re listening Hollywood, fellow member of the bald brotherhood Jason Statham should play me). 

So I’ll tell you some of the truths they need to hear, and since you know the culture and the language of your online mission field, I’m sure you can work out how to deliver it. 

TRUTH #1 You can’t be depressed without thinking a lot of yourself. Being down on yourself, means you’re thinking about you, a lot. You think you suck, but I KNOW I suck, that’s why I hang with the only religion that takes people that suck, while they’re still sucking. You think about killing yourself, I already died to myself, and it’s no longer I who live, but Christ living in me. (Galatians 2:20)

When you get into a tug-of-war, trying to convince people to believe something different, you only encourage them to pull harder on the other end. By contrast you can tell them that they’re just playing with all this, and wallowing in it, but that they should follow their own way of thinking to the end of the line, because you know that at the very bottom of life is a man with nail scars who understands suffering in a way you do not. 

TRUTH #2 You are the gate-keeper of your heart and soul. As overwhelming as grief, depression, worry, anxiety, and a million forms of negativity can be, and as much as emotions can’t just be shut off, we still control our thoughts. We decide how to handle the grief that comes our way, and we decide how much spiritual healing we’ll receive towards that grief. 

Happiness depends on your circumstances, so it would be weird to be happy when things are going wrong. But joy is a virtue, and virtues come from God, in infinite supply, and they’re always bigger than any human circumstances. Thus we can have joy in the midst of sorrow. But the trick is, we have to receive it. It’s one thing to be dying of an incurable disease, it’s another to have the cure sitting in that little white pill in front of you.

TRUTH #3 If God seems far away, guess who moved? If God abandoned and rejected sinners for sinning, He wouldn’t really have anyone left on earth to deal with, right? The enemy convinces people to stop receiving virtues like joy and peace, and love by convincing them that God simply isn’t there, and has nothing but judgement for them.

Think of the vulnerability it takes to go to a God, who you think has it out for you, and to go from being a really excellent victim, receiving all the attention that goes with that, to becoming the world’s most messed up Christian. Not much of a bargain. But if we can make the point that all us Christians are messed up in our own ways, and that God never leaves or forsakes us, giving us His full focus and loving attention, then maybe we have a chance at seeing things different.

So all you have to do is figure out how the best way for your people to hear these truths. Quote posts, poetry, music… you name it. And keep us posted on how things go! Who knows, maybe you’ll have a breakthrough that others could use!

slebhy2772 asked: What is the difference in trusting in God to provide what you hope for, and placing both your trust and hope in Christ?

Unka Glen answered: Awesome question. I may have a deep and abiding hope that by sweet little bald head will once again grow thick, lustrous, flowing hair, and that I’ll grow to 6 feet tall, and that I’ll get something called “abs” (which I’m not sure people have in real life, but still). However, I shouldn’t trust God to make all this happen and turn me into a male model, even though He has the obvious power to do so, because God has other plans for my life (despite the fact that I could WORK that catwalk y’all).

By placing my hope and my trust in Christ, he has led me into an amazing life, and He’s given me MORE at every turn, than I would dare to hope or ask for. Ephesians 3:20 says that God is able to do exceedingly and abundantly more than I could ask, or even imagine. So why limit myself to the tiny little dreams I would hope for? 

Now, to be fair, the Lord has taken me through times of poverty, times of deep despair, and through considerable physical danger, and He’s tested me (heck He still is testing me) in every way you can imagine. And part of that testing is to prepare me for the awesome opportunities He’s opened up in my life (like talking to you right now, which is way cool for me). It’s not been easy, normal, or ordinary. Nonetheless, it has been better than I would dare to hope for. 

Today, I express my sad little hopes and tell God the small dreams I would settle for, in order to set those things aside, and to embrace something wilder, scarier, more meaningful, and more fun, that He was preparing me for all along. 

bryandrums asked: Hey Unka Glen! I have been going through a season for a while now where I don’t feel God. I ask Him to help me get through a certain sin, or to help guide me through other things, but I just don’t feel Him talking to me, or helping me out at all. I have even asked to be comforted and I haven’t go it. I just don’t know what to do, am I not saved? Am I being tested? What do I do?

Unka Glen answered: If I may, let me give you one simple vocabulary word on this problem: aperture. An aperture is the opening on a camera that lets the light in. You can dial an aperture to be wide open or closed off to the size of a pinhole. The pupils of your eyes work like an aperture, in the way they dilate wide open, or close down, depending on how much light needs to get in.

In a manner of speaking, your soul has an aperture. And you decide how open or closed that aperture is. If you feel closed off from God, it’s closed off on your end. 

But when you think about it, there are lots of times when we’re not actually open to God. Sometimes, when the stress gets to a certain point, we get into a “bunker mentality”. We barricade ourselves off and try and ride out the storm. Other times we get angry and we really prefer to let that anger run its course, rather than be talked out of it. There are plenty of times when we might have the wrong attitude, but we don’t want a definitive ruling on that, lest we have to give up that sucky attitude. 

Of course we still believe in God, but sometimes it’s more comfortable for us to retreat into that “who’s to say?” kind of mentality. I could be called to become a missionary in China… but really, who’s to say? I could be called to break it off with my boyfriend… but who’s to say? Once you hear from God, there are only two options: obedience or disobedience. Who wouldn’t prefer the “who’s to say” game? Of course the Bible does say that “everything that does not come from faith is sin” (Romans 14:23). So there’s that.

Personally speaking I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked for wisdom, knowing I really needed it, but because part of me didn’t really want to face the finality of the answer, I had that aperture closed way down. Often I need patience, or peace, or hope, or you name it, and that aperture is closed down to a little keyhole. And meanwhile here’s me, frustrated that God isn’t stuffing it fast enough through that little keyhole I present to him. It sounds crazy, but that’s just how we are sometimes. 

Being open and vulnerable, even to a perfect, loving God is scary and overwhelming. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do but jump out into space and hope He catches you. But know this: whatever it is you’re dealing with, God can handle it. Be real and raw and honest with Him, that’s how He likes it, ugly feelings and all. Do whatever it takes to get to that place of openness with God. He truly longs to give you the comfort you seek. 

cheerfulcheesecake asked: At first I thought Unka Glen was your real (Scandinavian) name and in my head I pronounced it “Oonkah” with a Swiss accent. Thus, I imagined you were writing from a shack in the Swiss Alps called the “Citadel of Enlightenment” that was filled with candles and stuff. I imagined you being really old and wise with a floor length beard wearing burlap and furs that you recently pelted. I thought you sat on your fancy Swiss rocking chair while sipping a cup of tea, candles surrounding you, with a laptop on your lap answering questions American teens had asked. I figured you stood on your mountain and asked God for wisdom and you heard Him yell it back to you in the echoes of the mountain… So speaking of that, I was wondering, how do people have conversations with God?

Unka Glen answered: Wow. Just, wow. I have the best followers EVAR! And your image is pretty close to reality… except it’s a pickup truck, in urban Chicago, with strong coffee, and I’m clicking away on my smart phone in between appointments.

And yes, as you suggest, I think a lot of people picture that speaking with God in prayer must be like something towering, majestic, and mystically fantastical… as opposed to something intimate and familiar. As I mentioned in a previous post, when God speaks to Elijah in 1 Kings 19, there was a wind, but God was not in the wind, there was an earthquake, but God was not in the earthquake, there was a fire, but God was not in the fire. Then came a gentle whisper. That’s how God spoke to Elijah.

God speaks to all of us in that gentle whisper, but we rarely take the time to be still, and tune everything else out, and listen. It’s not about listening harder, it’s about removing distractions and knowing that His voice is always there, it just often gets drowned out by what psychologists call our “critical inner voice”. Yeah, well, I have another name for that negative voice I often hear all too well.

But you asked about having a conversation with God and the wording of that question takes us in the direction we want to go. We need to be able to have a back and forth exchange here. I need to vent and express myself, and then I need to receive wisdom on that situation in return. The key is knowing how to ask questions.

If you think about it, you probably have a lot of questions that you’re afraid to have answered, so if you ask those questions, you’ll pinch off your mind from receiving the answer. You may have complicated questions that might require a level of focus in listening that you don’t really have at this stage of your walk yet. So start with taking some simple yes-or-no questions into your prayer time. Seek your answer in Jesus’ name. Those who seek, will find.

Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” Isaiah 30:21

I’ve collected my posts on listening here.

What are you so afraid of? Money worries. School worries. Job worries. Relationship worries. Hello? Can I get an amen on relationship worries? You’ve got your own plans for how you want things to be, and God forbid that your small, tiny, sad little plans don’t work out. Oh the horror! You’ll settle for small dreams, because heck, that way you don’t ever get your hopes up.

I’m telling you: GET YOUR HOPES UP.

Small disasters are what God uses to make way for big blessings. Since I got really serious about following the Lord, my circumstances have constantly looked like total destruction might be looming on the horizon. Meanwhile, years later, no destruction. God taught me fearlessness by putting me in one insane situation after another, with His loving hands snatching away every danger, just before it took me out. I know what that dude was talking about, when he said “perfect love casts out all fear.”

And what is it that I’m supposed to be afraid of? No weapon formed against me will prosper, I am more than a conqueror, heck, this world isn’t even my home. What can you take from me that I haven’t already given to God? It was all junk anyway, you should see the blessings God gave me in return: peace, love, wisdom… and He’s gone ahead of me to prepare a place for me.

Read the other hecks here.